...even when you go away to college....moms still care about you....and your dental hygiene....*awwww*

TCMatriarch: Hey don't forget to floss!~

....thanks mom....i'll try not to get anymore cavities....*sheepish grin*

....the degree of my apathy does not fall below the degree of my emotion....

you and me
were as one
now i am me
and you are none
good riddance.

......tired of you and who you claim to be..........

...good times with good friends, and weird poems.....or is it weird friends and good poems? eh, no matter.....

I67945434: He proposed in the dunes,

Auto response from DeathByAltoids: class.....homework.....class.....work.....eat.....gym.......homework.....

I67945434: they were wed by the sea,
I67945434: their nine-day-long honeymoon

I67945434: was on the isle of Capri.
I67945434: For their supper they had one spectacular dish-
a simmering stew of mollusks and fish.
And while he savored the broth,
her bride's heart made a wish
I67945434: That wish did come true - she gave birth to a baby.
But was this little one human? Well, maybe.

I67945434: Ten fingers, ten toes,
he had plumbing and sight.
He could hear, he could feel,
but normal? Not quite
I67945434: This unnatural birth, this canker, this blight,
was the start and the end and the sum of their plight.
I67945434: She railed at the doctor:
"He cannot be mine!
He smells of the ocean, of seaweed and brine."

I67945434: "You should count yourself lucky, for only last week,
I treated a girl with three ears and a beak.
That your son is half oyster, you cannot blame me.
Have you considered, by chance, a small home by the sea?"
I67945434: Not knowing what to name him,
they called him just Sam,
or sometimes, 'that thing that looks like a clam.'
Everyone wondered, but no one could tell,
when would young Oyster Boy come out of his shell?
I67945434: When the Thompson quintuplets espied him one day,
they called him a bivalve and ran quickly away.

I67945434: One spring afternoon, Sam was left in the rain.
At the southwestern corner of Seaview and Main,
he watched the rain water as it swirled down the drain.
I67945434: His mom on the freeway in the breakdown lane
was pounding the dashboard - she couldn't contain
the ever-rising grief, frustration and pain.

I67945434: "Really, sweetheart," she said,
"I don't mean to make fun,
but something smells fishy, and I think its our son.
I don't like to say this, but it must be said,
you're blaming our son for your problems in bed."
I67945434: He tried salves, he tried ointments
that turned everything red.
He tried potions and lotions,
and tincture of lead.
He ached and he itched and he twitched and he bled.

I67945434: The doctor diagnosed:
"I can't quite be sure,
but the cause of your problem may also be the cure.
They say oysters improve your sexual powers.
Perhaps eating your son would help you do it for hours!"
I67945434: He came on tiptoe, he came on the sly,
sweat on his forehead, and on his lips - a lie.
"Son, are you happy? I don't mean to pry,
but do you dream of heaven? Have you wanted to die?"


I67945434: Sam blinked his eyes twice, but made no reply.
Dad fingered his knife and loosened his tie.
As he picked up his son, Sam dripped on his coat.
With the shell to his lips, Sam slipped down his throat.

I67945434: They buried him quickly in the sand by the sea,
signed a prayer, wept a tear and were back home by three.
A cross of gray driftwood marked Oyster Boy's grave.
Words writ in the sand promised Jesus would save.
But his memory was lost with one high-tide wave.


I67945434: Back home safe in bed, he kissed her and said,
"Lets give it a whirl."
"But this time," she whispered, "we'll wish for a girl."

I67945434: ~the end~

....oh, the honor students at cal poly.....what a trip....(GO HONORS GO!)

quote of the week

"This occurred to me one
day: 'Honors Students:
We like it hard'...but then
I thought 'I'm a guy....that
sounds really gross' so I
didn't tell anybody."

- Randy Franks

....in the words of Christian Miller.....

"When you are as gifted as me, accurate self-assessment looks like vanity to other people."

....ah yes, so true....

BAND UPDATE! WOO!

Band Name-----Den of Antiquity


Song Titles....
1. Circumscribed Pianist
2. Whipped into a Frenzy
3. Lest You Forget
4. Sexcellent Condiment
5. Perhaps, As It Were
6. Viscous Meniscus
7. Horrible Wet Blanket
8. Considerately Rude
9. Quietly Root for Me to Fail
10. Veritable Force
11. Think Pensive
12. Mental Insertion
13. Functionally Isomorphic

.......more to come later....

....economics....needs to die....what the hell is this quotation from my book?

"all such costs are costs of actions or desires.....[blah blah blah].....
consider the case of Amber Crombie and her husband Fitch....."

OH MY LORD!.....die econ. book die! oh, but it gets better......

"Amber and Fitch decide to purchase a house on Lake Lilypad, but soon notice that the lake supplies an odor, as well as a view. When they decided they can't stand the fumes any longer, they put their house on the market, but the best they can get for it is 60,000 dollars from a couple with chronic nasal congestion."

what, mind you, does this creative of a story have to do with me learning about SUPPLY AND FREAKING DEMAND!

the wall

i see you
standing before me
arms wide open
welcoming embrace
your arms
outstretched
reaching, reaching for me
your mouth
contorted into a smile
persuades me to come to you
But yet, i pause.....
for i look into your eyes
so cold
so calm
so full of apathy
and i turn away
for your hands are not enough
and your eyes, a wall
which prevents me from coming to you
i hope you are happy.

.....finally....the truth!.....

Somm312: Supply curve of my fist in Williamsons face is in real high demand

cameo by none other than.....TRAV!

THill652: i found this site, its a surrealist compliment generator
THill652: http://www.madsci.org/cgi-bin/cgiwrap/~lynn/jardin/SCG
THill652: i think this is my favorite so far: Your love is like 1000 caucasian carnivores playing mumblety peg with an eggplant
THill652: uhh, thats about it...
THill652: nevermind: Sir, you have most exquisite breasts

hot damn......that's all i have to say....hot damn

i think i've hit a creative lapse...."blogger's block"....if you will.....

..........maybe it's 'cuz my life just isn't that funny right now......damn useless drama......

BrothaWillay: so, what kind of 'bug' are we talking about here...i mean, that makes a big difference in the size of his pecker. see, i'm trying to picture this now. you know what i'm saying?
BrothaWillay: i mean, an ant is strong, but he's a little thang...and then there is the praying mantis, poor fella. after he gives it up, the heinous bitch bites his head off...and she still gets the lovn' for the man(tis) is such a stud that he doesn't even need his had to copulate.

will........you are one crazy mofo....

so....on sunday night, i babysat for these two little neighbor kids.....and i just want to know one thing.....

WHAT IS IT WITH LITTLE KIDS AND WANTING TO PULL DOWN YOUR PANTS AND SEE YOUR UNDERWEAR?!

...am i missing something here? or what the hell is going on?.......

"living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see......"

-john lennon

go here....it provides at least 5 mins. of entertainment....

and weeeeeeeeee

I GOT THE CAR I GOT THE CAR I GOT THE CAR!!!!!!!

.....for 30 days.....

..anyone who would like to contribute to the "Meagen Carroll needs money so she can buy a car in 30 days fund"....you may contact me at Dexters311@yahoo.com....or IM me at DeathByAltoids......thank you

.....wish me luck tonight guys.......

tonight is the night....when i talk to my parents.....and try to convince them that i need the car for college....hopefully, things will go my way....most likely, they won't.....but it's good to have dreams....

....yipes!....

....oh yeah! go me! go me!......

"Positive results depend on building from entirely new premises and not adopting the usual tried and trusted techniques of yesteryear. This is especially true in terms of your beliefs, which you have been gradually transforming for quite some time now. Over the coming days you will find the necessary time to look into a few more radical theories, and perhaps adopt those that will really help you make a difference. During mid-week the Moon squares Uranus, so you may benefit from reducing your schedule slightly or making sure that you take that extra five minutes to relax. Pluto makes a semi-square to both the Sun and Venus, which indicates that one particular social event may have quite a powerful impact upon you for a variety of reasons. As a result some new project or plan may take on a whole new direction."

how......sweet?

THill652: "my love for you is like diarrhea, i just can't hold it in"

i'm......touched?

(just kidding trav.....that's a funny quote)

Band Name-----Den of Antiquity


Song Titles....
1. Circumscribed Pianist
2. Whipped into a Frenzy
3. Lest You Forget
4. Sexcellent Condiment
5. Perhaps, As It Were
6. Viscous Meniscus
7. Horrible Wet Blanket
8. Considerately Rude
9. Quietly Root for Me to Fail
10. Veritable Force
11. Think Pensive
12. Mental Insertion

.......more to come later....

Rockergodforever: "Western religions tend to imagine God as either a burning bush or Wilford Brimley with a beard and dreadlocks. In the East, you get a little more leeway: one god is a bare breasted woman with six arms, another is a man with the head of an elephant. There is no doubt in my mind as to who had the better weed." -Dennis Miller

.....my daddy is one funny guy.....

what the HELL is this supposed to mean?

"Things are seldom as they seem.
Skim milk masquerades as cream."

it was in the MIDDLE of my economics book....and has nothing to do with anything....

economists are some screwed up people....

proof that someone thinks i am relatively amusing.....

TCMatriarch: You know what? I just read your blog and.....I think you should consider writing as a possible career. You are quite entertaining and engaging! love you

love you too mom!

p.s.....a little excerpt from my economics book....

".....it is important to realize, however, that economic theory by itself cannot answer any interesting or important questions......"

wow....they said it, i didn't.....

i find it amusing that this one "distinguished british economist" guy........his name was.....

I.M.D. Little

....how would you like to go through life with a name like that?.......

it's time for another.......BAND UPDATE!

p.s....so, i'm thinkin' that before i think of any new ideas, maybe i should find myself a band first......but that would entitle me having to take a leadership position, going out and seeking people who have things in common musically, learning how to actually play the bass guitar instead of just b.s.ing it........and that just may take way to much time and effort......

.....we fear change.......

Band Name-----Den of Antiquity

Song Titles....
1. Circumscribed Pianist
2. Whipped into a Frenzy
3. Lest You Forget
4. Sexcellent Condiment
5. Perhaps, As It Were
6. Viscous Meniscus
7. Horrible Wet Blanket
8. Considerately Rude
9. Quietly Root for Me to Fail
10. Veritable Force
11. Think Pensive

.....more to come later.....

so..i'm thinkin' that ASTROCENTER.COM is the shiznit! how do they always predict everything right?

".....which bodes well for any kind of career move that may be coming up. There is also the possibility of a flirtatious romance that could gain in depth as time goes on, although you may not want to broadcast this at first. Toward the end of the week, situations that have been filled with powerful emotions now stop boiling and come to a gentle simmer. You feel much more in control of your interactions with others, and ready to start off on a new tack with hope and fresh ideas."

I AM GONNA BE SO HAPPY THIS WEEK!

so....this morning, i tried to crash a speech class....one that i was ALREADY ENROLLED IN! but....because i am "too nice," i dropped it to hold a class for another person, and unfortunately, the speech class filled up....RAWR....but it's like it's ok...

so anyway....

we walked into speech class, and erik started to make a speech about why WE ALL (there were 6 people trying to crash the class) should be added to the class. THEN, the professor made ALL OF US state why we needed the class....and when i explained my 'sad story'...she said "aww, well...that's the fastest way to lose a class..." AFTER THAT....she made all of us go outside and then she had the class vote on which three people should be added to the class.....needless to say, i was not one of them....

bitches.....all of them....they're all bitches....

but it's like it's ok....i'll "meet them all again on the long journey to the middle.."

"i just needed someone to talk to.....you were just too busy with yourself..."

how true...that sometimes when we need people the most, they just can't be bothered....

those words are some very powerful lyrics...credit to Staind on that one..

so..i'm back at school....

here's what tonight's (saturday's) plans looks like....(to give you a little 'flava' of lil' nug's life...)

7:30: go get candy at albertsons
then: go get dinner (at like denny's or sumptin')
then: go see a movie (where? who knows!)
then: go rent a movie
then: go in a jacuzzi
then: watch the movie we rented
then: who knows what the night may bring!

when there are only two other people besides you in the dorm, it's a little difficult to find things to fill up a perfectly good saturday night...

band update!....(p.s.....to avoid any further confusion....i am not yet in a band...but if i ever form one, this is what it will be called, and these will be our songs...)

Band Name-----Den of Antiquity

Song Titles....
1. Circumscribed Pianist
2. Whipped into a Frenzy
3. Lest You Forget
4. Sexcellent Condiment
5. Perhaps, As It Were
6. Viscous Meniscus
7. Horrible Wet Blanket
8. Considerately Rude
9. Quietly Root for Me to Fail
10. Veritable Force

.....more to come later.....

so...i'm leaving for college today.....it's both sad and exciting at the same time. i'm really going to miss my family, like A LOT. *tear* aw, i'll stop with the emotional stuff...like this is what i deal with when i'm leaving....*tear* *tear*

(p.s. spencer is my lil' nine year old bro...)

HaleBopp424: Hey
DeathByAltoids: hi
HaleBopp424: this is spencer
DeathByAltoids: hi spencer
HaleBopp424: hi so...when ar you leaving to callege
DeathByAltoids: i think i'm leaving tonight at about 9:30 or 10:00
DeathByAltoids: :-(
HaleBopp424: sorry i spelled it wrong
DeathByAltoids: it's ok
HaleBopp424: :-)
HaleBopp424: i mean
HaleBopp424: :-(
DeathByAltoids: yeah....*tear*
DeathByAltoids: i'm gonna miss you guys
HaleBopp424: how bout you drive us to ice cream:-Dplease
DeathByAltoids: hahah
DeathByAltoids: maybe....if you go ask mommy

I"M GONNA MISS HIM! and then REST OF THE CREW!

My new philosophy....(haha...just kidding...)

"Save a wave.....ride a surfer..."

Sample day with my family....

Kelsey: "So are we gonna get our passes to universal studios?"
Mom: "Yah, i think so"
Kelsey: "YES so that means we get to stand and get our picture taken and say 'cheese'"
Haley: "*Sarcastically*No, you're gonna stand there and say bacon"
Kelsey: "Wait..what...you're supposed to say 'bacon' now?"

p.s.

i hate the ride "e.t." at universal studios......don't EVER make me go on it....EVER

worst experience of my life......tonight....universal studios....

we got out of the show 'waterworld' and all of a sudden, we heard these loud BOOMS and saw lights and stuff....(it was a mini 'explosion'....i thought it was a couple of bombs....) so it kind freaked me out...

THEN....

these 'fighter planes' flew over us TWICE (let the records show..) and scared the living DAYLIGHTS out of me...because i thought we were going to be BOMBED any second....my whole life flashed before my eyes, and then i promptly BURST into tears and i WANTED TO GO HOME...then the man behind me said, "damn terrorists".....

i never knew how scared i actually was of these kinds of things......it's a very scary feeling when you think you are about to die...very, very scary....

even though christmas has passed, i found this amusing, and had to add it....

Top Ten Things That Sound Dirty at Xmas

1. Did you get any under the tree?
2. I think your balls are hanging too low.
3. Check out Rudolph's honker!
4. Santa's sack is really bulging.
5. Lift up the skirt so I can get a whiff.
6. Did you get a piece of the fruitcake?
7. I love licking the end till it's really sharp and pointy.
8. From here you can't tell if they're artificial or real.
9. Can I interest you in some dark meat?
10. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall

it's time for a cameo by.......SPENCER (the nine-year old lil' bro....)

"i'm afraid of dying, suffocating, spiders, not breathing underwater, being in the bushes, being married, being buried, being buried alive, those people that wear clothes in department stores [mannequins]-yeah, i don't like them.., the dark, candles tipping over, fire, a door falling on me, a wall falling on me, sharks, large fish, sinks, and yeah....those things...."

he's such a goofy kid....

so....i HIGHLY reccomend seeing the movie 'a beautiful mind'.....

it was both funny and real, poingent and amazing....

it made me realize.......

WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!?!